I have been debating whether or not to blog about this and I’ve finally decided that it’s been such a strange experience that I have to share.
People say the strangest things when you are pregnant. For example, just last week I was sitting on an airplane across the aisle from a man. He seemed like a nice guy. He was in his seventies, wearing a baseball cap and traveling with his wife and daughter and a big Christian group, and he genuinely just seemed to be looking for a conversation partner. So he starts out by saying, "You’re pregnant, right?" (I should point out that I’m 6 and half months pregnant right now, so it’s hard to miss the belly.)
I said, "Yes, I am."
He said, "Good. I brought a lot of food." And he hoists up this bag that’s bigger than my briefcase that is chock full of food – everything from nuts to chocolate to crackers to who knows what else. And he did offer to share everything with me during the whole seven hour flight!
Then he says, "You are planning on going through with it, right?"
I think I just stared at him for a minute. I try to respond politely to all these strange questions, but that one caught me completely off guard. (In retrospect, maybe I should just raise my eyebrows or let my jaw drop so people could see the effect that these questions have on the pregnant woman.) I ended up saying, "Yes, of course." I then added, because I thought my belly should have been answer enough, "I’m six months pregnant." I mean who would go through with 30+ weeks of pregnancy if they weren’t planning on going through with it? It’s not been the most comfortable time of my life!
My other "favorite" question that I’ve been asked by everyone from friends to co-workers to strangers on the street was "Was it planned?" What kind of question is that? Would they ask if I looked older? If I was wearing a wedding ring on my hand? Do they ask every pregnant woman that? I’ve never asked anyone if their pregnancy was planned.
Frank’s "favorite" is "It’s going to change your life." Any child is going to change our life! It’s a whole new person. But we do have a child already so it’s not like we (especially Frank) don’t know what we are getting into!
I sent my top 10 strange questions to a friend the last time I felt like venting and he sent me back the funniest email where he managed to use all top 10 strange questions in a way that was hilarious and he wrapped it up with some very nice compliments and a funny statement at the end:
"I’ve always thought you’d make a great mom […] After all, Teddy [my dog] probably had better language skills at age 5 than I did and was more well behaved! I doubt you’ll ever need anything, but if you do, you can always ask me."
Good friends are priceless. And I just try to remember that a lot of the strange questions have come from very well meaning folks!
Your obvious pregnancy is a magnent just now. Actually, I think you could just shorten your heading to, “People are Strange!” When I was childless, it wasn’t so obvious but I did get questioned a lot. And I was as uncomfortable as you are with the comments. Somehow, in my responses, I often stumbled into an arena that was definitely no one’s business. When the questioner learned I wasn’t childless by choice, I almost always got this helpful advice: Well, just keep trying!
Your Granny Price had a saying that I still quote today. She would say that so and so was really a nice person, he or she was just a little “funny-turned.” I commend you for giving people the benefit of the doubt. We in the human race all need a lot of mercy. My conclusion is that we are all a little “funny-turned” at times.